Weazel News
⛄Special Community Coverage❄️

1/11/26

By Tess Tikel, Weazel News Lead Reporter/Anchor 

Los Santos traded gunfire and sirens for laughter and flying snow this week as residents came together for a citywide Snowball Fight Event, turning the frosty weather into a full-blown celebration of competition and community spirit.

After several high-energy rounds and some truly impressive aim, Erin Battles claimed 1st Place, proving once and for all that precision matters, even when throwing snow. Close behind, Yuto Shin secured 2nd Place with relentless pressure and sharp reflexes, while Trey Money rounded out the podium in 3rd Place after an intense final exchange.

But the excitement didn’t stop there.

In a surprise bonus round, Trey Money struck again, this time taking home a mystery prize that had the crowd buzzing: a brand new minibike, earning cheers and more than a little envy from onlookers.

Event organizers also made sure that every participant walked away a winner, with participation prizes handed out to thank those who showed up, suited up, and helped make the event unforgettable.

From snow-packed streets to roaring laughter, this event was a reminder that even in the coldest conditions, Los Santos knows how to bring the heat.

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WEAZEL NEWS
Local Update: Benny’s Under New Temporary Ownership as City Sees Surge in Gun License Requests and Alleged “Hunky Men” Sightings

1/03/26

By Tess Tikel, Weazel News Lead Reporter/Anchor 

Los Santos — One of the city’s most iconic automotive landmarks is officially entering a new era. Benny’s Original Motor Works is now under temporary new ownership, with longtime city figure Blake Asher stepping in as the shop’s proprietor. Known for keeping a low profile despite her reputation, Asher has already begun making quiet but noticeable changes to Benny’s operations. Staff confirm the shop remains focused on custom builds and quality craftsmanship, but with extended hours.

Meanwhile across town at the County Clerk’s Office, Su Yuu, notable North Korean diplomat, registered lawyer and sitting county clerk, reports a curious uptick in recent filings.

“Hunnay, I see big increase in gun license request,”

Yuu told Weazel News, adjusting a stack of paperwork on her desk.

“But it okay hunnay, Su like what she see.”

According to Yuu, a disproportionate number of applicants have been described in official documentation as “physically fit,” “very tall,” or, in one case, “quite hunky.” While the clerk’s office does not track attractiveness as a legal metric, Yuu admits the trend has been… memorable.

“All the people still being processed by the law,”

she added.

“No exception. Well, maybe charge more if ugly...”

City analysts speculate the rise in gun license requests may be tied to increased vehicle ownership, recent gang activity, or simply the fact that Los Santos residents continue to believe looking cool is a valid safety strategy. Meanwhile, opportunity seekers may want to take note. Both Benny’s and UwU Café have confirmed they are actively hiring, with open positions ranging from mechanics and service staff to front-of-house roles. Representatives for Benny’s say Asher intends to keep hiring local and “build something sustainable, not flashy.” UwU Café, for its part, was unavailable for formal comment but released a statement to our reporter:

“Yes, we’re hiring! And no, Tess, for the last time, we aren’t selling our cats on the black market.”

As Los Santos continues to blur the lines between chaos, commerce, and community, one thing is certain, whether you’re getting a custom ride, cooking up a “purrito”, filing paperwork, or applying for a gun license while flexing in the mirror, business is booming!

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WEAZEL NEWS EXCLUSIVE: 

Benny’s Motorworks Under New Ownership: Affordable Prices and Holiday Plans Ahead!

12/10/25

By Tess Tikel, Weazel News Lead Reporter/Anchor 

Los Santos — Benny’s Motorworks, the beloved automotive hotspot in Los Santos, has a new face at the helm. Weazel News’ Tess Tikel visited the shop today to speak with new owner Dave Jenkins about what drivers and car enthusiasts can expect in the months ahead.

When asked about pricing, Jenkins assured customers that “prices will stay low and affordable,” emphasizing his commitment to keeping the shop accessible to everyone. Holiday shoppers can expect promotions to be announced soon, though specific details are still under wraps.

The new owner also hinted at potential events for car fans, saying the shop “hopes to have a car show and/or meet event with prizes” in the near future, adding a spark of excitement for the local car community.

Tikel pressed on a more sensitive topic: the use of child labor in manufacturing the parts Benny’s previously used. Jenkins appeared taken aback, stating he “did not know that child labor was previously being used” and clarified that all of Benny’s current work is done custom and in-house.

As for the future, Tikel posed the tough question: with potential increases in imported goods taxes, might the shop ever revert to questionable labor practices? Jenkins offered no definitive answer, leaving the community to hope that Benny’s Motorworks will continue its ethical approach.

For now, the message from Benny’s is clear: affordable prices, custom craftsmanship, and a car culture experience that promises to rev up the holidays.

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🚨BREAKING NEWS:
Crime Surges as Police Struggle to Keep Up🚨

11/29/25

By Tess Tikel, Weazel News Lead Reporter/Anchor 

Los Santos — Crime in our city has reached unprecedented levels, and local law enforcement admits they’re fighting an uphill battle. In a candid interview, a BCSO officer, speaking on the condition of anonymity, revealed the harsh reality behind the badge: officers are stretched thin, morale is low, and exhaustion is mounting.

"Short-staffed doesn’t even begin to cover it," the officer told our lead reporter Tess Tikel. "We’re doing everything we can, but there’s just not enough of us to keep up with what’s happening on the streets."

Officials are urging citizens to remain vigilant as crime spikes, and law enforcement agencies are actively seeking reinforcements. A $10,000 sign-on bonus is now available for new recruits, and applications are being accepted at the MRPD station. Interested candidates can check the whiteboard in the lobby for details.

With the city at a tipping point, authorities hope that bolstering the ranks will provide much-needed relief for exhausted officers—and restore some semblance of safety to the streets of Los Santos. Stay tuned to Weazel News for ongoing coverage as this story develops.

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